A Day in my Neighborhood

Well, I guess you can say that I am now officially, officially home! Not only are Bobby and Jack on full display in my room, but yesterday I went up to Chicago for the first time since I moved out in June. While being back was a little sad (weird being on campus without a class to go to or paper to write) it did feel like being back home. I mean, I spent so much time on campus during my year and a half up there, I'm about as sentimental about DePaul's computer labs as I am about my first apartment.

My day was pretty hectic in terms of trying to see as many people as I could. I didn't get to see everyone I wanted to, but I did get to at least briefly visit with a whole slew of the people I wanted to see most. I got down there earlyish (like 10:30) and went downtown to make an exchange at Forever 21. While there, I got to see a man go coo-coo clock -- yelling at everyone about God knows what -- and also pick up a new journal. (I kept one on and off for the past four years, and decided it's time to start over). Then I went back to DePaul to meet up with a friend I met while taking Arabic last year. He was between classes, so we only had about an hour and a half, but it was so great seeing him! Literally everytime I see him I laugh until my face hurts, which is probably the best trait someone can have!

After that I went back in front of the library (a habitual haunt) and waited for another friend. While waiting, I bumped into a Poli Sci student I had a few classes with last year and have kept in touch with since graduating (thanks, Facebook!). We chatted for a few minutes before my other friend showed up, at which point the two of us went out to Wilmette to see the Baha'i Temple. I had never been, and it was just breathtaking! After walking around there, we went back into Lakeview to meet up with some ladies who were also Political Science graduates last year. We met up at the cutest coffee/tea/delicious sweet things shop, and talked for about an hour and a half before heading back closer to DePaul for their friend's going away party. Since I was driving home, I didn't drink, but I did enjoy some delicious mac and cheese bites. At about ten I started the walk back to DePaul and my car, talking to Helen to keep my paranoid self in check.

The one thing I learned: one day is not enough in Chicago! There was so much I wanted to do -- go to a movie at Landmark, eat a crepe at Le Creperie, visit the Art Institute, sit in on a class -- but didn't have time for. Next time I will not just be "traveling through" as a friend said I was last night. But all in all it was a fantastic day, spent with a whole slew of fantastic people, in what is still one of the most fantastic neighborhoods ever!

Still Got My Rock Moves...

Honestly, I thought it would be harder to adjust to being single. I thought that after 2.5 years of talking to The Guy every day, once I got back home I would be tempted to fall back into that routine, seeing as how I am a creature of habit. But oddly enough, I'm not really struggling with it at all. The one thing I seem to have forgotten in all of the stress of moving home: I actually enjoy being single. Sure, sometimes you want someone to curl up and watch old scary movies with (*ahem*, something I could go for), but for the most part, I love having the freedom to do what I want when I want, make all the random life decisions I'm faced with by myself, and dream as big as I can for the future. I'm stubborn when it comes to my own aspirations, which is only a problem when I'm in a relationship.

The one thing I am struggling with a little is some anger. Anger about what happened, anger about particular fights and days. In the spirit of neutrality, which I'm trying to maintain out of respect for our mutual friends, I have been running with the, "Things just didn't work out. It is a shame. Anyway..." sort of explainations. But now that I'm home, I don't have to keep the peace. I'm free to start processing everything that happened and sorting it out in my mind, and I'll be honest: it has resulted in a few total rockout sessions to that P!nk song "So What". Add a very angry set of parents to the mix and friends who provide support so solid you could build a house on it, and it's hard to constantly downplay everything that happened.

But, I am trying not to let it all get too much under my skin. Retrospective anger doesn't do anyone any good. The only thing I can do is take it as a lesson learned and move on with a little more wisdom than I had before, and way more clearly defined standards. I'm trying not to let myself become a victim, while also trying to keep myself square with the fact that the rumor mill might eventually churn out a version of events that makes him the victim. Oh the joys of the small town! I know why things ended, the people who matter know, and all I can do is continue to move forward and enjoy the people I have in my life. As my mama always says, the best revenge is a good life.

Oh, and start looking forward to the day I meet a nice Iranian fella. Mom decided a few days ago that it would just be too perfect if I fell in love with an Iranian while doing overseas research. Add Jewish or partially Irish heritage to that equation and I think my heart just melted!

My Move is Officially Complete!

Ways to identify Bridey's room:

• Vintage Remington typewriter on a shelf
• More books than the local public library
• Posters of: A Bout de Souffle and Annie Hall.
• A large, black cat in a canvas bin
• Bobby Kennedy framed on the wall

Having my belongings finally here is the biggest relief ever. And the fact that the mover was nice definitely helped the situation. In return for his sense of humor and kindness, we gave him freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.

Other exciting tidbits: I went to my first party as a single girl over the weekend! It was a Halloween Housewarming, to which I wore what I consider "everyday clothes". This was the second time I did so; in '08 I dressed as Audrey Hepburn, in a costume that doubled as what I wore that day. Saturday's costume was a '50s high school student, created by donning a new red cardigan and a black wool circle skirt I am known to wear when the weather is chilly. Fun/awkward moment of the evening: when a very convincing Principal Rooney said, "You like Neutral Milk Hotel? So do I! I also own a lot of cardigans. What a coincidence!"

Also, this week sees my return to Chicago for the first time since graduating. Thursday will be spent kicking it in the Chi, and I'm super pumped! I miss that city so much, and all the lovely people I was lucky enough to meet while living there. While one day is not enough time to see everyone, I'm thrilled to be able to be up there with a few of them at least!

Settling In

Ah, things are starting to settle into normality. My hair is cut, my cat is out of hiding, and I have a day where I need do no running around. Seeing as how my throat is bugging me, that is probably a good thing. Although my stuff not being here yet makes it all a little difficult (living out of a suitcase is never on my list of things to do), things are still on the up and up, and I'm starting to come out of me "This can't really be happening. I can't really be staying" state of mind.

Now, if you will please excuse me, I have a date with some chai tea.

Feels So Good Feelin' Good Again

I have literally been waiting to use that Robert Earl Keen lyric. And even after less than 24 hours back in Bureau County, I do feel so good again. It's an amazing weight off my shoulders, although it still hasn't set in that I'm not leaving in a few days. Everything is comforting, from hugging my family to walking the dog to sitting at Oriental Gardens while waiting to have lunch with Katie.

This morning Margaret and I woke up early to go to the local apple orchard (Tanner's) to get apple cider, apples, and apple donuts. I also grabbed a sweet pumpkin for a soup recipe I wanna try. We didn't stay long because it was cold, but we did rock out hard to a Lizzie McGuire CD Mag had in the car. When we got back, I went to Princeton to grab some chai tea, hangers, and cereal and meet up with Katie. Since I had some lag time between post chai run and lunch, I ran over to my dad's to see Draper! I hadn't seen him since July, and seeing that tail start spinning around was so fantastic!

After spending some time over there, I went to meet Katie for lunch. I hadn't seen her since July either, and while there was no tail spinning involved, it was amazing seeing her! We spent a couple hours catching up, then I went back to my dad's to take Draper for a walk. Dad rode his bike over and met us about halfway round the local park, and we walked him the rest of the way back together. We don't get too much time together to just visit, so it was nice to have some time with him!

When we got back we ordered more Oriental Gardens (I have a sickness) and went to my mom's house to carve pumpkins as a family. It was highly enjoyable, and great having everyone together. Then Margaret and I went for a walk around town, came home, and I made some hot chai. Now we are watching Law and Order on the couch.

Today was fantastic. I love being home.

It's Been Real...

Tonight is my last night in Ridgecrest. It's so hard to even believe this night finally came. Tomorrow, I will be sleeping in my own bed. OK. Fine. I'll probably be sleeping in my mama's bed, because I'm five years old and still like to sleep in The Big Bed as we call it. Regardless of where I finally lay my head after a long day of traveling, it will be in Walnut. And there is no place on Earth I am more thrilled to see.


Sorry, Tehran. You'll be back in the top spot soon. I promise.

The Power of Spin

Yes, break ups are hard. Yes, it's slightly embarassing that after being so amped for my move to California, I'm now running back to the cornfields as fast as I can. Yes, all of that is true, and while I'm occassionally eaten up by boughts of self-pity (and sit around listening to sad music on Pandora feeling completely sorry for myself), I've been trying to hard to see all of this stuff as a "learning experience" and to look at the impending future in a positive light.

While not always easy, I feel like I've done a fairly good job. After years of movie watching and book reading, I can pretty easily start going all "woe is me" when things don't go as I thought they would. This was particularly true a few years ago, when I felt like my entire life was falling down around me. But since going back to DePaul and getting myself on track, I've found it much easier to keep a positive spin on things. Considering that now I have a college degree, a plan for the future, and the support system I need, it's easy for me to think of the move home not as a failure on anyone's part, but as an opportunity.

I plan to make the most of this window of time. Since I have no intention of dating anyone for a long time (Kim suggested until I get my Masters), I figured I can take this time to get myself all shaped up and squared away. You know, better myself. How? Well, I have a few things I'm going to be doing at home to keep myself busy and moving forward (and off the couch this winter).

One of them is volunteer at the local animal shelter. We have a small operation that runs on volunteers, and it's where I got Draper a few years ago. So, I figured it would be a good way to give back a little, and I love animals. I'm also going to be signing up for yoga at the local natural foods store. I used to take classes at the community college, and have a DVD I do from time to time. But I need to get seroius about doing it, and this is the best way to keep me motivated. I'm going to make an effort to get back to eating healthy (I've been living on a string of sugar the past couple weeks) and to keep reading as ferociously as I have lately. I also want to cut down on the swearing; I have the mouth of a sailor, which I could definitely work on!

And of course, what would a major life change be without a drastic appearance alteration? I'm going to be completely changing my hairstlye, which I'm thrilled about. My hair now is super long, pin straight, and pretty flat. I'm going to be shooting for this look, with a loose perm to get those fabulous curls. Little to say, I cannot wait. Hopefully I'll be getting that done by the end of the month. I was going to wait, but I'm just too excited!